Mind Field of Bubbles

  This gorgeous girl was made by Kiri from Yarn & Clay in Tasmania and is the 4th addition to my little collection. Kiri has been making "Doodle" dragons and I had to buy this one because to me she has beautiful colourful bubbles all over her - hence the name. It was when I was writing up a post for my facebook page that I realised another happy segue to the whole "Mind Field of Bubbles" title.  I was writing how I bought her to remind me to keep my THOUGHT BUBBLES bright and beautiful, and I suddenly realised that's exactly what they are. Bright happy thoughts, compared to negative grey thoughts.  I still want to do a drawing of just bubbles (without words) of how my mind looks (bubbles wise) when I'm having a good day - or I'm in a good headspace, as opposed to having a bad day - or a bad run and an ok day.  I just need to process this a bit myself to work out how to reflect it the best way for others to understand what I'm trying to convey. My...

 Hi there  Times are still crazy and my moods vary from day to day at the moment but on the whole I'm having good days.  I had a bit of a shit time last weekend, but realised after the fact that it was probably due to not taking my meds.  You know when you overthink everything and you push people away when you actually need them the most? Yeah, I had one of those weekends.   I am so lucky to have a few wonderful friends who will just check in on me from time to time and I try to do the same for them. Anyway, just a reminder to you all to be safe, be strong and believe in yourself. Hugs xxx

 I took my little man out for a bit of a walk yesterday around a cemetery unlike any I've ever seen.  It was more like a botanical garden than a final resting place.  There were paths everywhere and waterfalls and water features and nestled in amongst the plants in the garden were little plaques of the people whose ashes rest there.  No particular pattern, just scattered here and there. Instead of feeling cold and grey as a lot of cemeteries do, this one was warm and full of love even though it was a freezing cold day. We had such a lovely time exploring with each other but do you know what.  I noticed that as soon as I walked through the door at home, my mood instantly changed and I went from fun loving, playful Mum to a person I really don't like very much.  A person that I am probably 80% of the time with my son. I felt my patience leave my body and stay outside.  I felt a dark cloud come over me like dread.  It was intense. Adulting is hard. P...

 I got to talk to my beautiful sister on Saturday for 45 minutes. She is the one person in this universe that truly gets me - even more than I get myself sometimes I think! We haven't talked for a while, we always have good intentions both ways but life just gets busy! She's been wanting to check in on me for a while and I've been meaning to ring her but there are 2 things that have stopped me: 1. it's usually 10.30 at night when I remember and she's an early bird 2. I knew I would cry. She's been following my journey on here and said how proud of me she is.  That in itself means more than she will ever know. We discussed some interesting points... My mantra - you are allowed to feel how you feel - is about not feeling guilty that you are feeling down when you have no reason to be.  It's about not entering into conversations when people try to make a competition out of things, or tell you that "everyone feels that way".  For example, I recently put...

When this is all over, if I never hear the phrase "unprecedented times" again it will be too soon. Victoria (Australia) is in lock down again, primarily because people in Melbourne can't do the right thing and stay home - or apparently keep their pants up! I've had a little moment, nothing compared to the one when I ended up resigning, but a moment all the same. I miss my Mum. I miss my sister.  I miss my best friend since kindergarten. I just want to see them and cuddle them and get cranky with Mum for the way I think she's judging me, cry with my sister because I need to and laugh with my bestie coz that's how we roll.  BUT they live in another state so I'm not sure when I will get there to see them.  I am blessed I still have my Mum and that I can speak to her on the phone whenever I want to.  I count my blessings all the while knowing that I am allowed to feel the way I feel.  Other people are going through it too, some worse off, and you know what? It...